It’s about TMI?

Too much information?

Jeremy brought to my attention today how much information was available on me through Facebook. I was being jokingly dismissive until another coworker reminded me that my credit card number was compromised the other day (fortunately my bank was savvy enough to suspect fraud, when “I” bought tickets to Bahrain, and block the charges), so I decided to at least contemplate what he was telling me. And nothing helps contemplation quite like writing. Hence this post.

(No, my credit card number is not on Facebook, at least that I know of.)

If you are a Facebook friend of mine, you can see a good amount of information on me. In addition to the demographic-in-to-this-not-into-that info I share, you can eavesdrop on what I am saying to other friends easily if it’s done on wall posts, somewhat less easily if a mutual friend shares privates messages that I sent them. Even if you are not a friend, a mutual friend can easily share what I write with you by allowing you to view their account. My best friend discovered that the hard way a while back, when as a recent divorcee and a novice to Facebook he trusted, as confidants, friends who were sharing all he said with his ex. And it’s not just what I am saying, but what I have said that is visible. Everything is “on record.” Some of what’s on record: names of pets addresses, place of birth, sibling names, parent names – provide the answers to “security” questions asked by financial institutions for identity verification.

One of the first things I did when I got my own domain, before Facebook existed, before people were “blogging”, was to list names of people who I was trying to find.  A few friends found me through my site, but not nearly as many as I had hoped. Once I got on Facebook I found or was found by more than I expected. And I have enjoyed catching up.

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This was going to be a post where I questioned how much of an online presence I wanted to allow. Then I saw a post from what I’ve thought for a while is one of the best places on the web. Elden Nelson is an enviably gifted writer and his anecdotes about cycling, and more importantly his openness about his wife’s struggle with cancer inspired a lot of people. Had he been paranoid about sharing too much information with the world, he and a lot of others would have lost out. Instead he has had people around the world praying for and pulling for his wife, Susan, as she fought for her precious life. And now that she has passed, people who never met her are touched by the news.

I’ve decided not to worry anymore. Life is too short to allow fear to make your decisions for you.

Win Susan.